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The Aligned Life

Jenn Stevens | Spiritual Life + Business Coach

How To Get What You Really Want – A Practical 4-Step System

by: Jenn

How To Get What You Really Want - A Practical 4-Step System

Isn’t it funny where you get your inspiration from? This week mine came from a Twitter meme:

when u know the solutions to all ur problems but u just don't wanna do em pic.twitter.com/hUTzw5d7tN

— beth mccoll (@imteddybless) February 19, 2016

Obviously, this post went viral because it’s funny and cute.

But it’s also very true.

I know right? Ugh.

Think about it: when it comes down to it, we all know somewhere deep inside exactly what it is we’re supposed to be doing to make ourselves truly happy.

But instead we’re our own worst enemy.

Most of the time we’d rather not take any real action in life, especially anything to do with (*gasp!*) Growth or it’s good friend Change.

We’re actually a lot more comfortable sitting around complaining rather than doing. Getting in this lacklustre mindset requires zero effort and keeps us trapped in that never-ending state of meh. But staying there means we don’t really need to be accountable for ourselves (because we keep saying we want to change!) and we retain full license to just keep talking about all the stuff we want to do (while never actually doing it).

It’s just too easy to stay in The Moping Zone.

But, back in reality, every single one of our issues can be dealt with.

We all know how to solve our own problems (or at least where to begin).

In one way or another, it comes down to the fact that we have each chosen our current version of life – as joyful or problematic as that may be.

And yeah, maybe you’re really not ready to move out of your comfy meh zone. That’s cool! Come back and read the rest of this article when you’re up to the task!

But what if you are ready for change?

I know I’m tired of falling into the moping trap. And maybe you are too.

Coincidentally, after I found the above tweet, I also came across this behavior model for effecting life change.

(Oh right. The universe is always listening.)

I wish I could take credit for this method but it’s actually based on Brooke Castillo’s life coaching methods (Find her on iTunes right over here!).

For the record, she’s not “Woo Woo” in the slightest and all of her stuff is incredibly useful so she’s well-worth checking out.

The idea here is to stop sitting around and waiting for certain things to appear for you. Instead, it’s about looking at how we can regain control and create those things ourselves.

So if you’re looking to take inspired action in your life, keep on reading.


How To Get What You Really Want – A Practical 4-Step System


Step 1: Goal

When you set out on a journey, you always have a final destination in mind. (Otherwise, how do you know you’ve arrived?)

That’s why goal-setting is so important in every aspect of life!

Let me just say, I feel this is where most of us fall short. We all kinda know what we want from life but without getting specific it’s pretty difficult to get there! So whether you’re spell-casting, manifesting or just straight up working on your shit, it’s important to get clarity about your end goal first.

So what is it that you want from life right now? Where do you want to be in three months time? Where do you want to go next? Your goals can be personal, professional, or any and all of the above. The important thing is to have one.


Step 2: Action

Every goal will require some sort of action on your part! Maybe if you’re looking for a relationship you need to start dating more frequently. Maybe you’re looking to lose weight and you know you need to set up a regular exercise routine. Again, you probably know exactly what’s required already!

For now, it’s time to focus in on what you need to do to take you to your goal – no more and no less. If you’re like me we all try to jam too much onto our plates (oooh shiny!) instead of focusing in on that one important thing. So maybe trying to exercise more and change your diet drastically is too much all at once. Choose your main battle.


Step 3: Feeling

Now imagine that you’re in the process of taking action to make your dream come true. What does that feel like for you? Empowered? Energized? Healthy?

There’s always a feeling that will align with your action – possibly even more than one! Once you’ve defined what those feelings are, think about them more carefully. Try to notice them in your life. Ask yourself how often do you feel that way now? And what could you do to feel that way more often?


Step 4: Thought

External events mean nothing until we assign meaning to them! And we’ve learned how to assign meaning over our entire life. We learn to feel rejected after a break up or after we get let go from our job. We learn to feel slighted if someone doesn’t call or if someone doesn’t match up to our expectations in one way or another. But all of that is open for interpretation. Every event can be spun positively or negatively. If we can choose to let information harm us, we can just as easily chose not to.

So which way are you going?

Take another look at your desired feeling and ask yourself what would you have to think in order to create that feeling. How would you have to think about yourself or about your current situation? What needs to change? How can you change your thinking right now so that it aligns with your overall goal?

The power to change begins in our own mind.

Thoughts become reality. And changing our thoughts is one way of making huge and profound shifts in our lives.




Good luck with your goal-setting! Please remember to share if you found this post useful. See you next week!




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How To Get What You Really Want - A Practical 4-Step System

How To Get What You Really Want - A Practical 4-Step System

Filed Under: Self Work Tagged With: Brooke Castillo, goal setting, life change

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Hey there Goalgetter! I’m Jenn – Bestselling Author | Spiritual Life & Business Coach | Creator of The Aligned Life and I teach you how to mind hack your way to your manifestation dreams!

 

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And now for a quick message from your Higher Self: And now for a quick message from your Higher Self:Love yourself enough to LET IT GOBreathe deep & have a happy Sunday my beautiful babes!
You are magic itself.And your desires have meani You are magic itself.And your desires have meaning for the WORLD.So if you really KNEW that you were here to feel happy and do the things that bring you joy, what would you be doing differently?If you’re like me, it’s too easy to forget our true divine nature.It’s too easy to believe our worries and limitations more than we trust ourselves and this beautiful journey.But if you could trust your magic for just a moment, what would change?If you knew your dreams where a matter of WHEN not if, how would this moment be different?All the magic you ever needed is IN you already. All you need to do right now is TUNE into it!
————————————————————————
with love + miracles ✨
~ Jenn
Identity shifting is KEY to manifesting.Because Identity shifting is KEY to manifesting.Because you ALWAYS manifest from your subconscious mind.Meaning you WILL play out old programs and ideas over and over again.Until YOU decide enough's enough! And do the work to REPROGRAM your mind to reflect what it you want and who you need to be.But sometimes, this work doesn't FEEL like it's doing anything.Those little tiny shifts on the inside are close to invisible--which might even make you doubt that it's happening at all.But trust me gorgeous, it IS.Keep taking tiny steps forward.Keep doubling down on who you WANT to be.TRUST the process and understandThat little by little, bit by bitIt all adds upUntil one day you look around and realize: I'm already there.
————————————————————————
with love + miracles ✨
~ Jenn
What would it be like to TRULY be enough for yours What would it be like to TRULY be enough for yourself?💜To not CRAVE that outside approval or validation?To forget about other people's opinions or what they say behind your back?To not motivate yourself to move TOWARDS something only because you cannot stand where you are?This just goes to show that as much as we all LOATHE to admit it, so much of what we do is based off of artificially leveraging ourselves UP.If so-and-so would only say "good job"If that person would LOVE meIf I finally did [ insert arbitrary goal here ]THEN I could finally feel good and actually TRULY love myself.Sometimes we all get our wires crossed on this at times. (Myself included!)We focus on the future fantasy that our issues will MAGICALLY disappear once X/Y/Z happens.And we chase the things outside of us, forgetting that the ONLY place our true happiness lies is within ourselves.I'm here to warn you:You could run the whole race of life and NOT get what you think you need from other people.You could meet milestone after milestone and still NEVER feel like you measure up. 😩ORYou could start being enough, right here, right now.Enough = you as you are, flaws, mistakes and all.Enough = you without anyone else.Enough = you.💗Happy Thursday Conscious Creator friends!
————————————————————————
with love + miracles ✨
~ Jenn
It's a FACT of life: you're simply NOT going to fe It's a FACT of life: you're simply NOT going to feel good all the time.And that's okay!Not gonna lie: the last month or so has been rough for me.The darkness of winter + strict lockdowns/limited holiday celebrations were TOUGH.I've definitely had my moments of letting it all get to me.But that doesn't mean anything has gone wrong.It doesn't mean that I'm somehow failing.And it definitely does NOT mean I'm putting more space between me and my manifestation goals.Even with the BEST of intentions, life is 50/50. Expecting perfection at any time will ONLY set you up for disappointment.Feeling frustrated, down, exhausted: those are all normal feelings for anyone experiencing a pandemic (plus general winter blues/ political chaos etc.)So while I don't want to create MORE of those feelings, I'm also not going to judge myself for having them.Making your feelings WRONG does not speed you up back into feeling better. It only creates self-loathing and resistance.Are you feeling the same? Here are a few things that are helping me right now:- Just letting myself cry if I feel like it (Sometimes 10 minutes of a good cry is a sufficient release!)
- Concentrating on pandemic-lockdown friendly goals that I CAN achieve (Doing pilates every day, meditation + Manifestation Journaling)
- Taking a break from drinking (I only drank about once a week anyway! But why not try going without it for a month?)
- Doing more behind-the-scenes entrepreneur stuff (The kinds of things that are so easy to put off for "someday")
- Using my SAD lamp every morning! (I only just got it but I swear it's helping)
- NOT judging myself too harshly if I suddenly don't feel up to doing the work I had planned or posting as much I "should" (Being an entrepreneur brings an EXTRA level of potential self-judgment that's hard to get out of at times.)This is all just a great example of one of the most important lessons of LIFE.You don't get to choose all your circumstances. But you DO get to choose what you do WITH them.What are you choosing to create right now? Whether you're in lockdown or not, I'd love to hear it!

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