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The Aligned Life

Jenn Stevens | Spiritual Life + Business Coach

4 Steps To Become Unf*ckwithable

by: Jenn

4 Steps To Become Unf*ckwithable

4 Steps To Become Unfuckwithable | Do YOU want to become unfuckwithable? Of course you do! This is the magical state where you are in control of your inner world so all the outer stuff isn’t so scary. If you want to start on the path to becoming unfuckwithable, then watch the video to get started!






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Thank you so much for watching!

Jenn Stevens | The Aligned Life




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4 Steps To Become Unf*ckwithable

Filed Under: Self Work, Video Tagged With: become unfuckwithable, unf*ckwithable, unfuckwithable

How To Become Unfuckwithable

by: Jenn

woman with pink hair & text that reads How To Become Unfuckwithable - to be above or beyond fuckwithability

Want to become unfuckwithable? I mean who wouldn’t want this:

unfuckwithable:
Adj; To be above or beyond fuckwithability. Unable to be defeated; Invincible.

Be honest! Have you ever wondered what it would be like to:

  • …Feel totally in charge of your emotions?
  • …No longer be the victim of your “good days” and “bad days”?
  • …Experience a good mood that’s almost 100% bulletproof?

I know that might sound like a total fantasy right now–but it doesn’t have to be.

Becoming unfuckwithable is actually just one simple internal shift away.

Fact: it’s only when you’re fully in charge of your thoughts and emotions that you have actual control over your life.

There’s nothing anyone can do or say to bring you out of that place.

Good days and bad days simply no longer exist.


How To Become Unfuckwithable - to be above or beyond fuckwithability


Being unfuckwithable means that you are fully in charge of the way you feel and not living your life at the mercy of the people or things around you.



It’s the ultimate in conscious living–and unfortunately–it’s also the exact opposite from the way most of us live!

Most of us still have good days and bad days.

Our emotional state is absolutely defined by the random events and circumstances in our life.

Instead of consciously acting, our life becomes dictated the world around us and by our own reactions to it.

Here’s an example:

  • One day you go to Starbucks and the person in front of you has kindly paid for your drink. (Woohoo!) This makes you so happy that you go to work and decide to give your assistant a huge public thank you for a project they just completed. In fact, your entire day seems to float happily by with everyone around you in an incredibly jovial mood. You end your day by taking a brisk walk around your hood, feeling utterly grateful for your life.
  • The next day you go to Starbucks and the barista messes up your order–three times. This makes you late for work which stresses you out so much you’re “accidentally” extremely rude to the parking lot cashier. As soon as you sit down at your desk you start complaining bitterly to those around you. But that doesn’t help. In fact, you feel a dark cloud hanging around you for the rest of the day which seems to get worse and worse. By the end of the day, you crawl onto your sofa and order takeout.

We’d all prefer to live the Example A day, right? Well here’s the thing: there’s actually a problem with both scenarios. In each case, the core issue is exactly the same: allowing the random events of the world to completely affect your mood.

In both cases, the external environment ultimately dictated the rest of your day. So even though sometimes that works out okay, when your mood is ultimately in the hands of someone else, you lose control over your ability to be truly happy.

Living this way makes you a human ping pong ball: wildly flying from one emotion to the next, with no rhyme or reason.

It’s exhausting. It’s also erratic, uneven and will eventually result in you feeling completely stressed and out of control of your own life.

It’s definitely not a healthy way to live.

But life doesn’t have to be that way.

When you choose to consciously act instead of unconsciously react, your entire perspective shifts for the better.

You’re back in the driver seat of your own emotions. You get to decide how you feel.

It no longer matters what happens at Starbucks! Your mood is even and calm, no matter what, good or bad.

You’ll realize there’s actually no such thing as a good day or bad day–there’s only the day that you have chosen create.

Once you realize that, you’ll no longer want to live a life that’s not dictated by random events.

You’ll be able to take your real power back and choose your own happiness.

Sounds pretty good right? So today I’m sharing a few ways you can become unfuckwithable and shift out of unconscious reacting into conscious action:


How To Become Unfuckwithable – Start Acting Not Reacting


How To Become Unfuckwithable Step #1:

Take Control Of Your Bubble



Start thinking of your natural energy as a bubble that constantly surrounds you.

And the only thing that can let anything into that energy bubble is you. Your mind is the gatekeeper, the decider of what sticks and what doesn’t.

Without realizing it, we all pick and choose our battles. Literally thousands of events happen to us every week but we’re the ones who ultimately choose which events we allow to into our precious bubble (and under our skin).

When you run on autopilot, it might often feel like you have no choice but to get upset about the rude waiter, early bank closure or whatever other annoying event might happen upon you–but the truth is you always do.

We all have a natural tendency to assign a negative meaning to a neutral event. For example, that might mean we interpret the tailgater behind us as someone who’s picking on us deliberately–when in reality, it’s probably just a distracted driver!

However, all you need to do to avoid the knee-jerk negative reaction is to take that neutral event and assign a different meaning to it.

One awesome way to do this is by using Byron Katie’s The Work. Essentially, it includes just four basic questions that’ll help you “flip the script” on every negative thought you have:

The Four Questions:

  1. Is it true?
  2. Can you absolutely know it’s true?
  3. How do you react—what happens—when you believe that thought?
  4. Who would you be without the thought?

(Read more about Katie’s methods in her book Loving What Is )


How To Become Unfuckwithable Step #2:

Don’t Argue With What Is



Have you noticed? A whole lot of our own internal drama comes from us protesting things that have already happened.

When something unexpected happens in our world, we often experience an Expectation Hangover: meaning that we have a very hard time accepting that the world didn’t play out how we though it would.

But of course, no amount of protesting and complaining in the world can make the clocks rewind!

In other words, when you spend a ton of time crying about things in the past the only thing you’re actually accomplishing is wasting your precious energy.

(Not to mention replaying those events over and over in your mind makes your body react like the event is still happening, making you literally stressed out.)

Still, Expectation Hangovers are just a fact of life. When things don’t go our way or something totally unfair happens, we get upset and–goddamnit!–we really want to talk (vent/complaining) about it. We want to yell and scream and stomp about how unhappy we are even though there’s literally nothing that can be done to change things.

Again, we’re simply taking the world personally–even though 90% of the time, there’s nothing personal actually happening at all.

Think about it this way: complaining about the past is about as useful as getting angry about the fact that Mondays exist. They simply exist! Do we like them? For most people, the answer is no. But there are few people who’d bother to waste their energy by venting and screaming about it.

So get very clear on this: by the time someone has slighted you, it’s already in the past. There’s nothing you can do or say to get that moment in time back. The faster you can let it go, the faster you will feel better.

Of course, this doesn’t mean you have to become a doormat in the process. Sometimes getting an apology or getting someone to right a problem is totally warranted. But many times our intense desire to seek “justice” just makes the situation worse, by allowing to drag on much longer than necessary.


How To Become Unfuckwithable Step #3:

Stop Seeking External Validation



Far too many of us rely on the external world in order to feel good about ourselves. But this is just a trick of our own ego. When someone approves of us, it allows us to approve of ourselves. But what that’s really saying is that you value other people’s opinions above your own.

We’ve all been taught to value other people’s opinions–and to a certain degree, that’s not a bad thing. But when we start to value other people’s ideas over our own, then we lose control of our own happiness.

Again, this is just an attempt to rely on the world around us to feel a certain way–an attempt that will always fall flat in the end.

Anytime we give our own power away like this, we lose control of our own narrative.

Because of course when the source of the validation disappears, so do our feel-good feelings.

The only real antidote to seeking validation is to cultivate true self-love. When you have full confidence in yourself and your own value, you’ll no longer need to bolster your self-esteem through compliments, awards, relationships or even material goods. You’ll be able to stand confidently all on your own. (Which is soooo unfuckwithable!)

Loving ourselves for who we are might be difficult at first but it’s your most important mission in this life. If you can’t fully accept yourself, you’ll never find true happiness, even if you have fame and billions in your bank account. You’ll constantly be seeking something that will make you feel better but that only ever provides a temporary fix.


Become Unfuckwithable Step #4:

Recognize What’s Out Of Your Control



Repeat after me: other people’s shit does not have to become your shit.

You might be a beautiful, glowing beacon of awesomeness in this world but it’s not your job to make everyone see the light.

You simply cannot control what people think or how they behave.

But you always have control over how you view yourself, how you view the world and how you act.

For example, when someone treats you poorly, you must remember that those actions are on them. You get to decide what to do with it and how to react to it. But that’s it. You never get to control their part of the equation.

At times, we fool ourselves into thinking that if we’re just nice enough or loud enough (or whatever enough, then the people in our world will think, say and do what we want them to. But in the end this is an impossible game. You can do everything in your power to make this happen and will still fail at some point. So don’t wear yourself out trying.

It’s a just fact of life: people are going to occasionally let you down, hurt you or even betray you–but you must realize that’s a reflection of them, not of you.

Instead of letting it get to you, pull back and concentrate on the stuff you can control: your own thoughts, feelings and actions.


Become Unfuckwithable Step #5:

Let It Go



Learning to let things go is a super-power all its own. But unfortunately, this level of becoming unfuckwithable usually does not happen over night! Those temporary bouts of rage or irritation will continue to rear their ugly heads from time to time, even as you begin to train yourself to become stronger and more powerful.

In other words, negative reactions will happen. So be gentle with yourself when they do!
When you start to go into reaction mode, take a deep breath and try to at least hold back your outer reaction. (In other words, don’t be tempted to lash back! That usually only makes things worse and doesn’t reflect your true intentions.)

With that being said, it’s definitely okay to feel your feelings! Acknowledge them for what they are but also try to realize what has triggered you. Everything is here to teach us something but there’s no need to hold on after you’ve learned the lesson.

Once you’ve felt the feelings for a while, then it’s time to let it go. This is the best thing no matter what the situation might be. You’re no longer escalating the situation and bringing that negative reaction into the rest of your day.

Trust me–this process gets easier over time! And sometimes it just happens naturally.

For example, I used to drive regularly and I used get very upset about things like traffic, erratic drivers etc. I experienced road rage and it made the driving experience extremely stressful! But of course at the time, I didn’t attribute any of that to me. I felt like I was a victim of the drivers around me.

Fast forward to a few years later: I got a new car after not driving for a few years and with it came a surprisingly zen attitude towards driving. Suddenly all that road rage-y stuff no longer bothered me! If someone cut me off, it still sucked but I no longer took it so personally. It didn’t require me swearing or venting and it certainly wasn’t worth mentioning to my partner when I came home at night.

The only thing that really changed in that time was my attitude. The drivers and traffic were always about the same. I was simply no longer letting all of that stuff into my bubble. So miraculously, driving was no longer a stressful experience!

My experience wasn’t a conscious choice; it just happened over time. But it’s still a great way to illustrate how our own attitude creates our energy–and in turn our reality.





Ready to go from thinking about your dreams to actually making them happen? Check out my Manifestation Journaling Masterclass & get the scoop on the EXACT method I use to manifest daily!

Get What You Want With The Manifestation Journaling Masterclass




So tell me: which tip are you going to use to become unfuckwithable? Which area do you need the most help letting go and staying strong?




Remember: you have the power to shift from unconscious living into conscious living at any time you like! If you’re tired of feeling like a victim, then today’s a pretty damn good day to begin to become totally unfuckwithable.

I hope this post serves you! If you loved it, please remember to share it.

As always, thanks so much for being here beautiful soul!

Jenn Stevens The Aligned Life



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How To Become Unfuckwithable - The Aligned Life

Filed Under: Manifesting + Law of Attraction, Mindset, Self Work Tagged With: become unfuckwithable, how to become unfuckwithable, popular, self-love, unfuckwithable, unfuckwithable mindset

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Hey there Goalgetter! I’m Jenn – Bestselling Author | Spiritual Life & Business Coach | Creator of The Aligned Life and I teach you how to mind hack your way to your manifestation dreams!

 

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Oh hey there friend! πŸ’—There are lots of new f Oh hey there friend! πŸ’—There are lots of new faces here & it's been a little while since I last introduced myself.So hello! My name is Jenn & I'm on a mission to connect you to your MAGIC.I teach you how to create the life you want by using your MIND.You might have heard that you can use the Law of Attraction to attract what you want through your emotional states.Which IS true.But most of us don't realize that our THOUGHTS create our emotional state.Repeated thoughts become beliefs.And those beliefs create our MINDSET.So when you have a low sense worthiness around ANYTHING you happen to want to manifest, you WILL see only lack and limitation.You WILL buy into the old programming that tells you you could never do/be/have that.You WILL secretly self-sabotage and get in the way of the very things you want so much.I used to feel lost and down on myself. And I used to HATE what my life was like.But something inside of me was pointing me in the direction of learning more about spirituality and personal development.The more I learned about manifestation + the brain, the moer the pieces began to click together.And the faster my life began to RAPIDLY change!(Check out my story on how I manifested my book deal for example.)I'm telling you this because I KNOW you can create so many of those dreams of yours, if you JUST learn how to get out of your own way.And that's what I'm on a mission to do, every single day.Want to work with me? You can get started with manifestation with my Manifestation Journaling Workshop.Or if you're ready to go deeper in a private setting, drop me a DM to learn more about my hypno-coaching program!AND PS - I'm also about to launch my Recode membership site (which I'm SOOO excited about). So stay tuned for that!But I'm SO DAMN EXCITED to have you here for this journey! And I thank you so much for being part of my little manifestation community. Now--let's TRANSFORM!
Getting on the manifestation train, who's coming? Getting on the manifestation train, who's coming?Emoji me below if you're part of Team Manifestation! πŸ‘‡πŸ‘‡
What do YOU need to believe to create your next le What do YOU need to believe to create your next level-reality?Remember: your old beliefs created the life you're living now.But instead of getting upset about that, it's SO much more useful to think on where we want to go next.So what do YOU want to create?And what do YOU need to believe in order to get there?This is the CREATION part of being a Conscious Creator: meaning that YOU get to decide on what your life looks like. But you also have to do the work to CREATE it, starting from the inside out.So get excited about what YOU are going to start believing in next! &  happy weekend to you #teammanifestation !
β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”
with love + miracles ✨
~ Jenn
You're never lost, my darling!And things have ne You're never lost, my darling!And things have never gone wrong.Even when things don't LOOK the way you want them to, always remember:There is magic in this moment--and EVERY moment.So lock it in & double tap to AFFIRM it:I trust that I am right where I am mean to be! ✨✨
Right now, your SOUL is calling for your magic.S Right now, your SOUL is calling for your magic.So are you ready to answer the call?I know life doesn't seem so magical at times.And I also know that when you're down or feeling defeated it's REALLY EASY to forget one simple thing.The magic is IN you.And it always has been!Every time we tell ourselves that we're not strong enoughOr good enough or smart enoughOr that we need someone or something ELSE to swoop in and "fix" usWe're opting out of using OUR power.But none of that stuff means that you AREN'T magic.It simply means that you've FORGOTTEN and fallen out of touch.But every day brings us a new opportunity to connect with our TRUTH.So what are YOU going to do with your magic today?How can YOU decide to change your life for the better, even if only by the tiniest degree?If you feel like sharing, drop me a comment below!And if you need a little help unlocking your magic, then reach out! I'm looking for a few special souls who are ready to undo their old ways of being so they can BLOSSOM into their dream life. Is that you? Send me a DM to learn more!

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