Did you know: your goals are never just about what they appear to be on the surface?
They can always help reveal the truth about our true motivations in life, just as long as we’re willing to look!
Manifesting can be just another way for us to hide our heads in the sand and avoid the very things that are most important. Plus many of us are attempting to manifest something simply in order to feel better about ourselves. We think that if we get the guy/money/job etc. then we’ll finally feel good about ourselves.
But that’s just following the a formula that doesn’t work! As much as you try, you cannot use something outside of you to heal your inner wounds.
Attempting to do this is what we call spiritual bypass–and it might be the very reason you can’t manifest what you want!
You can’t simultaneously fear something and successfully call it in. Your fear and insecurities will remain until you do the work to clear them.
Face it: the Universe always know what’s up. (And how annoying is that??)
The bottom line is: you can’t skip the lesson that’s right in front of you! So there’s no point in trying.
But you can still manifest your desires, just as long as you’re willing to ferret out those issues and fears so you can truly heal them. It’s from that place of wholeness that we have the most magnetism and power! So please take this guide not as a cautionary tale but as a place to begin the healing process.
Spiritual Bypass: The Top 3 Symptoms
There are three major signs and symptoms of spiritual bypass:
Spiritual Bypass Symptom #1:
Goal-setting is undeniably a tricky business! We decide we want certain things in life because we think they’ll make us happy. But one the biggest truths of life is that happiness isn’t a result. It’s a choice! So all the material goods or life achievements in the world won’t necessarily make you happy! Fortunately, that means happiness is always optional no matter what your life might look like.
However, we’re here to grow and expand and goal-setting is the perfect path to doing that. Plus, our desires are also part of our unique soul path. Following them might not take you exactly where you want to go but it will always take you to where you’re supposed to be.
Still, for many of us, goal-setting doesn’t come from an enlightened place. Instead, it’s part of our old outside-in paradigm. We think that manifesting the car or the Louboutins or the ring on our finger will make us (finally!) feel good about ourselves. So we set out manifesting those things. But the core issues are all still there. If you feel insecure or unloved or whatever right now, the thing won’t make you feel better for more than a day or two.
All too often the goals we set for ourselves do not ultimately have our best intentions in mind. We’re just playing catch up so we can feel similar to our peers or using something outside of us to try to feel good.
When you’re doing this you’re putting the power in the object or event, more than in yourself. You’re creating situational validation, which is not true happiness at all! Your worthiness is the key issue here. If you don’t think you’re worthy, the Universe will ultimately echo that back to you.
Spiritual Bypass Symptom #2:
Operating from a scarcity mindset means you’re constantly competing with others or somehow worried that there’s not enough to go around. But it’s really all just fear in a slightly different format.
Not surprisingly, scarcity most often comes up around money and abundance. When people try to manifest winning the lottery, their desire is often rooted in a place of scarcity. They’re looking outside of themselves for the answer because they don’t fundamentally trust in their own ability to make or keep that kind of money.
Another way we default into scarcity is by buying into scarcity beliefs. When it comes to money, there are an awful lot of them–so many that you might not even have questioned their validity! For example, “Money doesn’t grow on trees”, “You have to work hard to get rich”, “The rich get richer” etc. We hear these things so often over a lifetime we often start to regard them as fact, when they are anything but.
Test out your own scarcity beliefs by thinking about what you’re manifesting for yourself. Are you only trying manifesting because you think you couldn’t get it in the normal Muggle way? Or do you truly believe in scarcity beliefs around money (or love or whatever it is)?
None of those scarcity stories are empirically true–which means you also get to not believe in them, even if you’ve carried them with you for your entire life! Your beliefs are literally what creates your world so dare to exercise your right to choose in something that’s supportive of you.
Spiritual Bypass Symptom #3:
Fear comes up in many ways but the ultimate fear tactic is one we often don’t even see! Our ego loves to trick us into avoiding the very thing we need to work on the most. It’s just afraid of actually dealing with it and therefore having to change! But instead of actually experiencing fear, it’s probably hiding your fear, by convincing you that your real worry is not that important or that you can somehow go through life without dealing with it.
Two very common areas this comes up are around love and money. (Like always!) For example, many people get fixated on manifesting a million dollars. But it’s not the million dollars they really want! They’re really just trying to avoid their own mountain of money problems. If you’re avoiding looking at your credit card or bills, that’s a red flag that you’re actually afraid of your money situation. Trying to manifest from this space will be an uphill battle because your desire is ultimately rooted in fear.
When it comes to love, our secret fear can tell us all kinds of things to keep us small and safe. “All the good ones are taken.” “Dating in this city is too hard.” “I’m too old/fat/poor etc.” Those excuses might even sound legit at first but they’re really just putting a layer of bubble wrap around your heart!
It’s only once you try to look beyond those issues to see the real issue of fear and you’ll have a chance of being able to call in what you really want!
The Cure For Spiritual Bypass
Authenticity is true power and that includes being authentic and real with yourself. Like I always say: You can have whatever you want as long as you know your why!
In other words, your why is key to manifesting successfully! When you’re brave enough to be 100% honest with yourself, you’ll start to see how many of our desires are actually attached to our Shadow. They come from the dark and murky places in our psyche and are not always imbued with our highest good.
When you try to heal a wound with something that’s outside you, you’re never going to succeed. However, it’s not all bad news! You can still have the thing you want; but you just need to work on healing that wound first.
It’s only once you’ve found self-acceptance and healing that you’ll truly be able to call your wish through. Your wound will always have more power over you until you can summon the courage to face up to it. And once that happens? Boom! You’ll become totally magnetic.
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You really can have whatever it is you desire just as long as you’re coming from a place of true power. Don’t be discouraged! You always have the power to overcome whatever blocks you might find. After all, you created it all so that also means you can destroy it!
Have fun manifesting with this & thank you for reading!
PS Looking for more? You might also want to check out this post about how to integrate your shadow or this one about why you shouldn’t manifest happiness.
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