Jenn Stevens with text Is Hyper Independence Holding You Back?

Video: Is Hyper Independence Holding You Back?

Navigating Through Hyper Independence: A Guide to Balanced Self-Reliance

Do you often find yourself refusing help or support, insisting on handling everything alone? If so, you might be experiencing hyper-independence. While being independent is typically seen as a positive trait, hyper-independence is its extreme form, where the refusal of support or assistance becomes a controlling mechanism. In this post, inspired by Jen Stevens, best-selling author and CEO of The Aligned Life, we’ll explore the nuances of hyper-independence and how it impacts our lives.

What is Hyper Independence?

Hyper independence manifests as a relentless pursuit of handling all matters solo. It’s a state where you never ask for help, reject assistance, and believe that relying on others is a sign of weakness. It’s a coping mechanism often rooted in childhood experiences or past disappointments.

The Control Freak Factor

Hyper independence is closely linked to a need for control. It’s common among type-A personalities who view dependence as a vulnerability. However, this mindset can lead to burnout and missed opportunities for growth and collaboration.

The Impacts of Hyper Independence In Work and Relationships


Hyper-independent individuals may struggle with teamwork, delegation, and career advancement. They often feel overwhelmed by additional responsibilities due to their reluctance to share the workload.


In personal relationships, over-independence can create imbalances. Trust issues and an inability to share responsibilities or vulnerabilities can strain connections with partners and loved ones.

Childhood and Family Dynamics

Many who exhibit hyper independence have faced instability or lack of support in their formative years. They have possibly experienced childhood or small-t trauma. Recognizing this pattern can be the first step in healing and adopting healthier approaches to interdependence.

Balancing Hyper-Independence

Trust and Support

Embracing the concept of trust and the willingness to accept support can significantly lighten your emotional and physical burdens. It involves a shift in mindset from absolute self-reliance to a balanced approach where accepting help is seen as a strength, not a weakness.

Masculine and Feminine Energies

Hyper-independence is often linked to an overemphasis on masculine energies – control, action, and solitary achievement. Balancing these with feminine energies like receptivity, intuition, and collaboration can lead to a more harmonious and fulfilling life.

Manifestation and Letting Go

For those engaged in manifestation practices, independence can be a barrier. The law of attraction emphasizes trust and letting go, which are antithetical to the hyper-independent mindset. Learning to trust the process and embrace a balance of action and receptivity is key to successful manifestation.

Moving Forward

Embrace Healing

Reflecting on your childhood experiences and recognizing patterns that led to hyper-independence is crucial. Programs like Jen Stevens’ Recode offer tools for this introspective journey, aiding in healing and recalibrating your mindset.

Dare to Trust

Challenge yourself to lean into trust and receptivity. Dare to explore what life can be like when you allow others to support you and share your burdens. This doesn’t mean losing your independence; it means enriching it with the strength of interdependence.

Feminine Power

Regardless of gender, embracing feminine energies is vital. This includes nurturing intuition, allowing for flow and creativity, and accepting help and support.

Apply the Insights

If you’ve resonated with any aspect of hyper-independence, now is the time to apply these insights. Adjust your mindset, open yourself to support, and balance your energies for a more fulfilled and less stressful life.


Hyper independence, while often stemming from a place of strength, can lead to unnecessary stress, isolation, and missed opportunities for growth. By recognizing and addressing this tendency, you can foster a more balanced approach to independence, embracing both giving and receiving support. Remember, true strength lies in the ability to balance self-reliance with healthy interdependence.

Jenn Stevens The Aligned Life

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Jenn Stevens with text Is Hyper Independence Holding You Back?


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